Thursday, May 3, 2012

Stress – Its Purpose in Life

Have you thought about these questions?
  • Are you stressed by your life?
  • Are you being challenged by people and events daily?
  • Would you like to eliminate stress forever?
Well, of course, you have! You have a brain!
BUT, have you ever thought the answers to those questions might be the following:

  • Eliminating stress is a fantasy
  • Managing stress is a learned skill.
  • Designing your destiny requires you to manage stress.

In this week’s essay, Ken Pierce addresses the need for stress in our lives, and, not only that, tells us that it can be good for us. Really??? Really!!!



Maturity is achieved when a person accepts life as full of tension.
~Joshua L. Liebman

Do you know someone who says their life is?

If you do have someone saying this to you, there is one of three things going on:
They are heavily medicated!
They are lying!
They are dead!


I say this with such confidence because:

Stress means you are alive!
Stress means you are growing!
Stress means you are learning!
If your value system views the stress as negative, we refer to it as distress.
If your value system views the stress as positive, we refer to it as eustress.
To not experience stress is to not experience life itself. This is the intent of all mind altering drugs whether prescription or nonprescription. Their intent is to alter the mind into thinking you can have pleasure without pain.
So no brain, no pain. If you are in a coma, you are pain free, which is why they sometimes put people into a medically induced coma to enable them to heal pain free. If you are conscious, you are in some form of mental or physical pain, or both.
In other words, if you are conscious, you are experiencing some form of challenge at every second of your life. You are also experiencing some form of pleasure by meeting that challenge.
Our culture markets the illusion that if you have the “right” something, you will get more pleasure than pain. It could be the right health or looks, the right family dynamic, the rights friends or colleagues, the right amount of money or possessions; the right job or status, the right education or attitude, or even the right spirit or religion.
But the truth is, nature ensures that we each have an even split, 50/50 of pleasure and pain at every second of our life.
If you’re skeptical, check it out! Recall a time when you experienced what you would call extreme pain. Notice at that very second the pleasure in it. I will offer you a recent example of mine.
I pulled some muscles in my leg and after a period of limping around I went to a physiotherapist named Jenny. She checked me over and told me the problem and said she would need to work out the tension in my thigh muscles causing my limp. She started to massage my thigh using a lot of pressure. And even though she warned me it would hurt, it was excruciatingly painful to me. But at the same moment there was a certain pleasure in being able to endure it; being able to tough it out; being able not to succumb; being able not to cry out or give in to it. For me, in my value system, being stoic and strong is important, that masochism which many of my generation still carry.
Now let’s go to the other side. Find a moment when you experienced what you would term extreme pleasure. Perhaps it was with a special person or being in a special place. Here is one of my recent examples.
I mentioned in an earlier piece a recent overnight snow storm we had of about 15 centimeters. The next morning I was in a winter wonderland of pure, whipped egg white! It was a pristine paradise! And while I was in awe of the beauty around me, at the same time, in fact, at the same second, I was equally aware of it being only temporary as the snow was already falling from the branches.
This is how nature works at all times in each of our lives. Once you prove it to yourself, there is a shift in our thinking about our self and our life and those with whom we share it.
The famous Cuban-French author Anais Nin captured it perfectly another way. She said, “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” Check out your own experiences and find the other side to each event.

It is revealing and inspiring to realize there is a balance
to every second of your life.
POINTS TO PONDER AND REMEMBER:
  • Stress means you are alive and growing!
  • To not experience stress is to not experience life itself.
  • If you are conscious, you are in some form of mental or physical pain or both.
  • Nature ensures we each have an even split, 50/50 of pleasure and pain at every second of our life.
  • Once you prove this balance to yourself, there is a shift in your thinking about your self, your life and those around you.
  • The challenges you face managing stress shows you the inherent balance enabling you to appreciate your life.
  • Your greatest asset for managing stress is your ability to choose how you think about it, whether it is distress, eustress or neither – just another opportunity to rediscover self appreciation.



Stress is a constant in our life and provides us with priceless opportunities to grow, learn more self appreciation.


Take Away Tool
The Stress Neutralizer
Step 1 - Think of a time when you were very stressed.
Step 2 - List the pains or costs of this experience to you.
Step 3 - Now make an exactly equal list of pleasures, advantages or significant learning which came to you from the same stress.
Step 4 - Exhaust your memory ensuring your list is exactly equal.
Step 5 - Notice how you feel, now, about the experience.


Further information: www.clarendonconsulting.com

www.healthydivorcestrategies.com

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